Jul 7 2009

Learning To Say To Her That You Are Sorry

So there you are – you know that you have screwed up with your woman and now it is going to be up to you to figure out how to get her back. Fortunately you do not need to be a genius to figure out what the first step is going to be. The easiest, and most logical, step is just to say that you are sorry. As it was your fault, just accept this and confess to it. You are the one who messed up the relationship, so it is going to be up to you to ensure you correct the situation. She has no reason to do the hard work here, so the sooner you accept you are at fault, the more likely it is that you will be able to smooth things over. If you are not used to apologizing, and saying that you are sincerely sorry for your behavior then this short article should point you in the right direction as I suggest to you how to get back with your girlfriend.

I go over strategies for getting back with your ex girfriend in more detail on my Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back page, which you might want to read now.

Part one of the process of how to get back with your girlfriend is to say you are sorry. Now, it is very important that when you tell her you are sorry that you show some real remorse, because then you can ask for her forgiveness, and explain to her that it will not happen again. Only if she believes that you sincerely wish to make it up to her, will she allow you to prove this to her. Otherwise, if she detects that you really begrudge your apology to her, then you will not get far with this. If you intend to fake your apology to her, you might as well not bother picking up that phone, or knocking at her door.

Let me run that by you again, because it is important. You have to show her that you really feel bad about what happened. You must show some remorse. This is no time to exercise your tough guy demeanor. I am not suggesting that you have to show watery eyes or anything that is going to have you feeling truly uncomfortable. That is not what she needs to see from you anyway. Just lower your eyes when you tell her how sorry you are. This way you will appear to be too ashamed to look her in the eyes. Do not try to look cute. That kind of behavior is not congruent with the goal of appearing genuinely sorry.

The other important part of learning how to get back with your girl involves understanding how to ask her for forgiveness. You must be sincere, or at the very least you need to try hard to appear that way. If you really want to get back together with your girlfriend you must understand that she needs you to be nothing less than sincere with her. If you cannot be sincere you are going to need to be a really good actor, and that in itself may just be harder to pull off than simply accepting that you ought to be sincere with her.

Let her see that you do not intend to ever do whatever it was that put you in the doghouse with her to begin with. This will very likely be a hard thing for you to do because, let’s face it, we males find it tough to accept the idea that we might be anything less than perfect. Most men find that it is not easy for them to tell someone that they will not screw up again. But this is exactly what you need to do. Nor can you simply say to her, “I’ll try”. You must commit to not repeating the mode of behavior that got you into the situation that you find yourself in presently. You will make mistakes again – you just have to keep from repeating that particular one, otherwise she will feel as though you have been wasting her time, and you will not get that third chance to get back with your girlfriend.

When you tell her how sorry you are you will probably have to sell it with the promise of a nice treat. Perhaps a fancy dinner somewhere. Or buy her a nice gift. You cannot buy her love back, but you can buy a little bit of time to try winning it back, and if you do everything else correctly this should be like placing a nice little bow on top of your apology. Go all out with this. It may be obvious to her what you are trying to do, but it may well be worth it as she sees just what you are willing to put yourself through to gain her love again. The more it appears as though you are really trying to get back together with her, and that you are honestly sorry for what you have done, the greater your chances of successfully benefitting from these lessons on how to get back with your girlfriend.

Once you get back with her you may want to consider reading one of the better men’s books on dating, like the one discussed on my The Art Of Approaching page. This way you will learn more about what it is that a women wants from a man, and you will be less likely to make the kind of mistake that made this article worth reading to you.

Jul 7 2009

If You Want Her Back, Sorry Is As Sorry Does

So there you are – you know that you have completely botched it with your woman and now it is going to be up to you to figure out how to get her back. Fortunately you do not need to be a genius to figure out what the first step needs to be. The simplest, and most logical, step is just to tell her that you are sorry. As it was your fault, just accept this and confess to it. You are the partner who messed up your relationship, so it is going to be up to you to ensure you correct the situation. She has no reason to do the hard work here, so the sooner you accept that fact, the more likely it is that you will be able to win her back. If you are not used to apologizing, and saying that you are sincerely sorry for your behavior then this brief article should point you in the right direction as I suggest to you how to get back with your girlfriend.

I discuss strategies for getting back with your ex girfriend in more detail on my How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back page, which you might want to read now.

The first step in this process of how to get back with your girlfriend is to apologize. Now, it is very important that when you say you are sorry that you show some real remorse, because then you can ask for her forgiveness, and tell her that it will not happen again. Only if she believes that you sincerely wish to make it up to her, will she allow you to prove this to her. Otherwise, if she cottons on to the idea that you really begrudge your apology to her, then you are not likely to get far with this. If you plan to fake your apology to her, you might as well not bother picking up that phone, or knocking at her door.

Let me run that by you again, because it is important. You have to demonstrate to her that you honestly feel bad about what happened. You must show some remorse. This is no time to fall back on your tough guy demeanor. This does not mean that you have to cry or anything that is going to make you feel truly uncomfortable. That is not the thing she wants to see from you anyway. Just look down when you tell her how sorry you are. That way you will seem to be too ashamed to meet her eyes. Do not attempt to appear cute. This kind of behavior does not mesh well with the goal of appearing genuinely sorry.

The other important part of learning how to get back with your girlfriend involves understanding how to ask her for forgiveness. Do your best to be sincere, or at the very least you need to try hard to seem that way. If you truly want to get back together with your girlfriend you must acknowledge the fact that she is expecting you to be nothing less than sincere with her. If you cannot be sincere you are going to need to be a damn good actor, and that in itself may just be harder to pull off than simply accepting that you ought to be sincere with her.

Let her see that you are not going to ever do whatever it was that put you in the doghouse with her to begin with. This will very likely be a hard thing for you to do because, let’s face it, we males find it difficult to accept the possibility that we might be anything less than perfect. Most guys find that it is hard for them to tell someone that they will not screw up again. But that is exactly what you need to do. Nor can you simply say to her, “I’ll try”. You must commit to never repeating the mode of behavior that got you into the trouble that you find yourself in right now. You will make mistakes again – you just have to keep from repeating that particular mistake, otherwise she is going to feel as though you have been wasting her time, and you will not be given that third chance to get back with your girlfriend.

When you apologize to her you will probably have to sell it with the promise of a nice treat. Perhaps a fancy meal somewhere. Or buy her something nice. You cannot buy her love back, but you can buy a little bit of time to try winning it back, and if you do everything else right this should be like putting a nice little bow on top of your apology. Go all out with this. It may be obvious to her what you are trying to do, but it may very well be worth it as she sees just what you are willing to put yourself through to gain her trust again. The more it appears as though you are really trying to get back together with her, and that you are sincerely sorry for what you have done, the better your chances of successfully benefitting from these lessons on how to get back with your girlfriend.

Once you get back with her you may want to consider reading one of the better men’s dating books, like the one discussed on my The Art Of Approaching page. This way you will learn more about what it is that a women wants from a man, and you will be less likely to make the kind of mistake that made this article worth reading to you.

Jun 29 2009

How To Get A Girl To Adore You

We have all had that one special woman in our lives. The one with the sweet personality, the really nice hair and the perfect face. She is the one who dates the more “adept” fellows. So, the question is: how do you get her to like YOU?

The short answer is that you become an alpha male, and the longer answer is found in the book profiled on the following How To Become An Alpha Male review page.

For now, let’s concentrate on what can be conveyed about this process in the space of a single page.

While men are primarily attracted to a woman because of the way she looks, women are attracted to men because of their inner qualities. The perfect man, for them, is the alpha male who has confidence in himself and who is not afraid to take the lead to get what he wants out of life.

Generally, what this means is that the best way to get a woman to like you is to make her feel like she has EARNED you.

This works because to get a woman to really develop an interest in you, you need to exhibit a mindset of high value. Never appeal to her from a position of neediness.

So the best way to think about approaching any one particular woman requires a mindset that includes:

1. Nonchalance.

2. Disregard for the outcome of whether or not she decides she likes you. (By which I mean, if she likes you, great, but if not, there are always other women out there who are just as great as she is.)

The main point to understand here is that a girl should never be a challenge for you. Instead you need to be a challenge for her.

Besides placing a high value on yourself, you need to also eliminate any neediness on your part by cultivating your social network. Make friends with as many women as you can. (Fortunately, girls are very easy to make friends with.)

Also, attempt to date as many women as you can. Do not limit yourself by only dating “that one special girl.”

Why? Because the last thing you want to be going through your mind when you are around that special girl is the thought that, “God, I MUST have her! She’s absolutely unique!” Having a surplus of women in your life will ensure you avoid thinking this way.

Besides, when a woman notices that other women are attracted to you, she will also experience attraction. Psychologically, this is known as the phenomenon of “social proof” and it is much more powerful in women than men.

Have you ever seen the way your female friends drool over some guy in the bar who has got four women at his table? That is social proof in action.

By the way, it is all right to think that a girl is beautiful and to feel strong emotions for her.

Here is the important thing though – you always need to remind yourself that there are LOTS of other women out there, many of whom who are just as wonderful as this girl you really like.

If you begin to convince yourself that any girl is totally unique, that gives her total power over you, and, ironically, she will lose any attraction she has for you.

So, you are free to believe that a woman is amazing. Simply remember that many other girls are amazing too. This way you will not become needy.

So, the moral of the story is this: you should place a high value on yourself, you should make her earn your attention, and you should spend time with as many girls as you can. Use these three essential techniques for how to get a girl to like you and you will see amazing results very shortly.

If you need more details on the tactics suggested here, check out the dating books, where you will find reviews of the top rated relationship books for men.

Jun 25 2009

2 Books On Dating For Men

Relationship books for men are not always easy to read. Some of them are put together by guys who should not be allowed to get within ten feet of a keyboard. Almost half of the dating books for men that I have read have fallen into this category. To save you hours, money, and the frustration of realizing that you have made a bad choice in your selection of a dating advice guru, I am going to point you towards those books worthy of your consideration.

In particular, I am going to concentrate on just two relationship books for guys. If you elect to read either of these books you will discover a great deal about the nature of women, your relationship to them in the grand scheme of things, and how you can significantly increase your prospects of landing the girl of your dreams.

Now, I will admit that this sounds like a lofty goal. But consider the reality that most guys face when they begin their dating attempts in earnest. To start with, none of us guys are given the user manual for women. To us, they might as well be alien invaders for all that we understand about how they think and the things they do.

To make the situation even tougher on ourselves, what we do learn about women through trial and error, we do not share with one another. Girls do just the opposite. They make it their duty to exchange stories with other women and build up some semblance of how the male animal reacts to certain stimuli.

Not us, we take our suffering in silence and wonder what the heck is wrong with our technique. If failure with women seems to be the norm for you, you are hardly alone. Ninety percent of all the other guys out there are no better off than you are. The other ten percent, the ones who are having all the fun, well there is not a whole lot of reason for them to clue you into what you are doing wrong that is driving the women in their direction.

Yes, there are some amazing little secrets about women that a few men have divined by sheer luck, or through the sheer audacity of experimenting with methods that most guys would never be bold enough to try in a thousand years.

Fortunately, two of these guys have taken it upon themselves to educate the rest of us about what it is that they have been doing right when it comes to woman. What makes this pair stand out from the other dating gurus who clutter up the mens dating and seduction niche is that these two guys are very smart, they write with clarity, and they hit the nail on the head when it comes to trying to successfully understand the motivations of the women we would try to make our own.

The first of these authors is John Alexander, whose book you can learn more about on my How To Become An Alpha Male review page. John’s point of view is that it is useless to pursue women, and instead what a man should do is focus on himself, and learn how to become an alpha male – the kind of guy that other guys automatically look up to and respect. If you can win over the guys, says John, the women tend to follow with no extra effort on your part. How you do that – and turn yourself into an alpha male is, of course, the topic of his book.

John’s philosophy is appealing, especially if you regard yourself as the kind of guy who has tried hard to be appealing to women but for whom success just seems to keep alluding you. As you will discover in his book, alpha males do not attempt to be appealing to anyone other than themselves, but in a way that naturally attracts the opposite sex.

The second writer is Michael Pilinski, whose book you can learn more about on my Without Embarrassment page. Michael differs from John in two ways. He is a little more the thinking man’s version of the dating guru, and he is discernibly more frustrated with all the learning experiences that he has been forced to go through in order to arrive at the point where he is now. His hard won successes with women did not come without battle scars, and he is not afraid to show them, because he understands that there are millions of men like him across the world that have run into all the emotional hardships that he has experienced when dealing with the seemingly cruel logic that women use to decide whether to admit a man into their world.

Well, Michael has figured out the secret female protocols, and he is spilling the beans, because he does not feel all guys need suffer in the way that he has. The bottom line is that if you feel cursed when it comes to women, Michael Pilinski is the guy to read. Get yourself a copy of his book Without Embarrassment and be prepared to be blown away by the revelations that this guy has to make. You may never look at another women in quite the same way again!

So there you have it – two excellent mens dating and relationship titles to choose from. If you want a straightforward and mellow approach to conquering the hearts and minds of women you will want to go with John Alexander. If you think your issues with women run a little deeper, and that you may need to psychoanalyze yourself to get at the root of your problems, then Michael Pilinski is your man. But regardless of your decision, you really cannot go wrong if you select either of these books on dating.

Jun 16 2008

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