A secret relationship could seem exciting at first, but it can also become a burden to keep the secret. There are legitimate reasons for not telling anyone about a relationship. At some point, the burden of secrecy will probably start to strain the relationship and you will have to decide whether not keep it a secret relationship.
One of the main reasons for having a relationship with someone secretly is because you worry what other people will think. Maybe your parents or friends would not approve of this person. You should really stop and consider why they would not approve before having a secret relationship.
Your family and friends really just want what is best for you in most cases. Now and then there are situations where they just want to impose their will on you. But for the most part, they are looking out for you.
Do they feel the person will hurt you, or does not treat you right? Has that person given them reason to think the relationship might not be a good one? If they disapprove on those grounds, you can hardly blame them. In fact, keeping the relationship a secret hints that you might not disagree completely.
It could be that you just do not want to hear their protests. But it also could be that you know they are not entirely wrong. Otherwise, why not have the relationship out in the open and show them how wrong they are?
If they disapprove of the relationship for reasons that are petty or clearly based on their own issues, then you should ask yourself why you are having a secret relationship at all. Things like thinking that your partner does not have enough money or class, for instance, would be no reason to hide the relationship.
You may, out of a desire to not have to hear their complaints. But for such a narrow minded reason, you should not worry about keeping their minds at ease. If they do not like your partners race or even sex, it can be simpler to keep the relationship a secret. But you should not have to unless you really want to.
Why not show them that you are your own person and you are proud of how you feel? By having your relationship out in the open, you are being more true to yourself and your partner. And maybe you will even change their minds about what being a relationship means.
You might even be surprised to find some friends or family members do not feel the same as the rest. Often, if a family or group of friends is against something, like an interracial relationship, you perceive each person as feeling that way.
But it could be there are a few who did not want to speak up and be different. Do not be too hard on them for not standing up for you and what they believe in. They probably felt outnumbered and did not want to hear the arguments. And you are in a secret relationship, after all, because you did not want to have to hear the protests either.
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